Psychology of Personality

Selfishness and egocentrism are differences, examples of selfishness from life

Egoism is a value orientation in psychology,the quality of a person, through which he puts his own interests above the interests of other people, the group, the collective. The egoist will never take part in a business that does not benefit him, he does not understand the sacrificial morality of serving his neighbor. The behavior of a selfish person is completely determined and guided by motives of personal gain, without taking into account how much its benefits can be costly to others.
Altruism and egoism are the opposite concepts and fromIt follows that the egoist is oriented towards satisfying his own needs, while completely neglecting the interests of others and using them as a means by which selfish personal goals are achieved.
The egoist is in love with himself with all his heart, sometimes heforbids others to love themselves, because they consider them unworthy of their attention, therefore such people almost always remain lonely. A selfish type of behavior inherent in people in whom
and too much self-confidence. When they have a certain desire to have something, then they should give it now and on a silver platter. They completely exclude the fact that they will not have it or that they need to wait for some time.

Selfishness and egocentrism difference

There is also a concept similar to selfishness - it is egocentrism. Between the categories of selfishness and egocentrism, the difference in definition.
Selfishness is a personality trait, a part of her character,which is manifested in behavior, and egocentrism is a way of thinking. The egocentric sincerely believes in the existence of only one correct opinion, and this is his own. Only his idea has the right to exist, and he establishes the order, and he will not hear anyone else's arguments. The center of the universe closes on the egocentric, he is the navel of the earth, he sees only himself at the head of the world, he was born with such a feeling and it can pass or more or less loosen at the age of 8-12. If an adult behaves like an egocentric, then he is "stuck" in the past, something happened and it did not allow a person to grow up.
The main thing is that between the concept of selfishness and egocentrismthe difference is manifested in the need for other people. The egoist, though hiding behind a mask of selfishness, but he actually wants to share with others his experiences and wants attention. The egocentric does not need others, he is really well off to one, he is alone in his world and no one breaks his order. If egoism still has a positive connotation, then there is no trace of egocentrism in it.
Selfish examples are from life. For egoistic people too much aspirationhave everything, even that which will never be needed, but others have. This is too pointed attention to their own desires and their satisfaction, even at the most inopportune moment, inherent in small children who do not yet know what is good or bad, and what can be done now, and what can cause a negative reaction in society. But the terrible truth is that such manifestations of selfishness are inherent in both children and adults, who physically withdrew from that age for a long time, but did not grow up psychologically. They have no sense of satiety, and not only in food, but in all things, they are always small, always lacking. They want a big piece of cake, they need the whole cake.
Human egoism has in itself childish traits,but the brain of such individuals works better than necessary. All the time they need to look for ways to get more. It is necessary to invent tricky tricks, how to get what you want. Their minds are always tense, it is aimed at calculating ways to achieve their own benefit.
It is because of this that human egoism is considereda trigger mechanism for progress. A person is in motion, and, therefore, develops, inventes, creates and achieves. It is this feature of egoism that gives him a positive connotation. If, from childhood, a certain way to direct selfishness in the right direction, use this energy as a motivation for achievement and at the same time teach the child moral and ethical principles, according to which it is necessary
, but respecting the needs of other people - you can raise a very purposeful personality.

The problem of selfishness

Most selfish personalities are not allowed intheir world is alone, they experience all their inner impulses in private, and do not need outside help, but there are among them those who really need the presence of a loved one who will help, hear and understand. But, it also happens that they simply need the physical presence of a person without any impulses of the soul. For such people, the absence of others in their lives is equal to the crisis state. But with anyone, they will not make acquaintances and even more let them into the personal space. It is not easy for them to learn to trust others, they must personally verify, understand from their own experience what a person is and only after such a rigorous verification they are dared to trust.
The problem of selfishness lies in the peculiaritiesthe formation of personality, the circumstances of her growing up, the correctness of education. At certain life stages of growing up through the influence of unfavorable conditions, the person develops selfish qualities of character. Thus, manifestations of selfishness, perhaps at any age.
Egoism in relationships is a big problem, because there are two people in the pair, and they are obliged to love each other, not each other, and the other. Often behind such over
there was a lack of self-confidence, and thatthey had to work hard to overcome, and as a result of such work, they gave too much energy, and, obeying the temptation, overdid it, and they liked this new sensation. And when such a man just found a couple, or returned to his current relationship is a completely different person, then problems begin. For a selfish person, everything seems to be normal, even better than it was, because now she knows her own worth, which means that she can demand twice as much. She does not understand that such behavior hinders building an attitude, because all attention and care is given to only one person. The couple is also for that and a couple, if it has two people, then the initiative must come from everyone.
Egoism in relationships breaks down the families and destinies of people. But if a person value relationships, he will work on himself and be able to change.
Egoism is considered a problem in the sense thata person who spends life energy on himself, often does not notice how he poisons life by others, not paying attention to their needs, he can never feel the joy of disinterested action for others.
Selfishness and altruism. If you compare altruism and selfishness, you canto single out in them a common idea - the value of a person. It's only in altruism that the needs of others are respected and disinterested deeds are done for their good, and in selfishness, a person respects himself and realizes personal needs. A sense of selfishness can alternate with altruism, depending on what kind of life it brings lessons. A person could one day do an unselfish good deed, and in return receive a misunderstanding and condemnation of his deed. Then the defense mechanism is included in it and from that moment it will start doing good deeds only for itself. There is also his mistake here, because it is impossible to generalize all cases, there are sincere grateful people who appreciate the act, you can not so quickly become disappointed in people. In society there is a problem associated with rejection of neither selfish selfish actions nor sacrificial altruistic actions. Selfish deeds are condemned for pleasing the needs of one person, and in altruism they try to find a trick.

Reasonable selfishness

There is a theory of rational egoism. A person who has inherent reasonable egoism defends his opinion, rejects the point of view that is imposed, since it can bear the damage to the individual. He is ready to compromise, if this is a way out of the conflict situation. If you feel threatened to yourself or your loved ones, then applies all possible ways of protection.
A man with reasonable egoism will never beto obey others, this is beneath his dignity, but he also does not allow himself to lead the life of others, and does not do this even if he can use it. If there is a question of choice, a healthy egoism suggests that you need to do it for personal gain and not indulge in guilt.
Reasonable selfishness pays attention not only toown needs, but also the needs of other people so that the satisfaction of their own does not hurt the interests of others. You need to express your opinion, even if it is contrary to the opinion of all others. You can express your criticism towards others, but, without sinking, while up to the level of insults. Act on its own principles, but also respect the wishes and remarks of the partner. The person following to healthy egoism has a special mindset, due to which he understands life better. When it comes to material things, a person does not fixate himself on the fullness of his own profit. He tries to get his own, but at the same time, not walking on the heads, and without causing suffering to others, is inclined to cooperate and find compromises. It has more ethical principles than selfish impulses.
A person who is engaged inself-improvement, does it personally for themselves, so other people do not interfere. But in this self-improvement, he can go very far, can start teaching others how to live, there is already a little bit of a line between reasonable egoism and the ordinary.
Egoism is an antonym to this word altruist. Reasonable selfishness is also altruism.
An example of reasonable selfishness. When a person makes an unselfish, usefulactivity, the result is joy and happiness. Since this happiness was calculated, the person who did this act also shows joy, which means that the goal has been achieved. All of this is only good.
Everyone really does, to some extentselfish, because he must take care of himself every day: eat, sleep, dress, earn money, spend them first of all on himself. This is an absolute reasonable egoism. Working on your body, developing your brain, working on your spiritual essence is also a reasonable egoism that benefits everyone.

Examples of selfishness

Everyone can name examples of selfishness fromlife of their loved ones, or their own. Almost every person has such an ardent egoist in his circle of acquaintances. His rhinestone can be calculated, in principle, he does not hide, but, on the contrary, he tries to be in everyone's mind.
The egoist is a very calculating person, he beforewill get down to business, think how much it is profitable for him, what fruits he will be brought by his participation and, weighing all the pros and cons, he agrees to the matter or not. He does not take any quick decisions.
Virtually all conversations with him will be so ordifferently, but necessarily comes down to his personality, the discussion of his successful past and luck in the present time. The egoist recognizes the existence of only his opinion. He can not even imagine that the opinion of others, even much more experienced people than he himself is, can be true. If circumstances compel him, he will be able to find a way out of the situation, but only at the expense of the efforts of others, or quite unfairly accuses them. He is not at all interested in the intrigues or problems of others, he lives quietly himself, while nothing affects him.
Examples of selfishness from life. Owning the techniques of manipulation, makesothers give in to him. If he is offered a compromise, he refuses and waits for him to surrender. Selfish people often like to give advice on how to live properly, although they themselves are far from being models for imitation. In any business, they benefit, or frankly without back thoughts, demands it. You can also give examples of selfishness from life behind the characteristic external features of this type of people.
Manifestations of selfishness. The egoist is very concerned about his appearance, he lookson himself and admires. And to be beautiful all the time, and for others too, he needs a lot of time to pay attention to himself in front of the mirror. Almost always egoists are the most attractive people, fixated on their body, they can not admire their appearance and know what others like. To emphasize the beautiful appearance, they dress very stylish, sometimes even outrageously. A selfish person always tries to make a good impression, that is why he uses good manners in his behavior, he tries to create the impression of a well-bred person. He also distinguishes a selfish person from among his other vocabulary, he flaunts with phrases: "the end justifies the means", "everything is possible to me," "I am much better", "I am the most ...", "I have," "I want," "for me " and so on.
Selfishness in life. Selfish individuals can apply the characteristics of their nature, working in power structures, police, military affairs, business, cosmetology.
Examples of selfishness in literature. Scarlett "Gone with the Wind" by Margaret Mitchell, Vronsky "Anna Karenina" by L. Tolstoy, Dorian Gray "Portrait of Dorian Gray" by O. Wilde and others.
A very famous and vivid example of egoism can beserve Grushnitsky "Hero of Our Time" M.Yu.Lermontov. The author himself believes that Grushnitsky is low and fake. The hero does everything against himself. He wants to feel something that he can not feel, tries to achieve something, but not what he truly needs.
He wants to be wounded, wants to be simplea soldier who at the same time is unhappy in love, wants to despair. He dreams about it, but fate disposes of it differently, saving his soul from life's upheavals. If he fell in love, and the girl did not reciprocate, he would be disappointed in love and forever closed his heart. He was so eager to become an officer, but after receiving news of the production, he always forgets his former suit, which he loved so much, as it turned out in words.
Examples of selfishness show thatThe problem exists, and many people become unhappy because of their own irrationality. And if you stop, look at your life and take a lesson from it, you can change, get rid of selfishness, because he does not promise happiness, but only breaks people's hearts and fates.

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