Psychology of relations

How to survive a divorce with your wife - advice of a psychologist

How to survive a divorce with your wife? There are several important recommendations that you need to have an idea for everyone that helps to survive these circumstances without unnecessary destructive emotions and depressive moods. It is generally believed that only the female sex is disturbing the marriage bond. However, for all this, according to statistical data, women are the initiators of rupture of marriage bonds in seventy-one percent of cases. The male half of the population can feel much more intense emotions associated with discord in the relationship, which will not be intense in expression, as a result of which male experiences will be hard to notice externally. Therefore, most of the descendants of Adam are worried about the problem of "how can a man survive a divorce with his wife?". Questions relating to the newly emerged cells of society and family relationships, in the current society a priori, have become the most painful, controversial and urgent. After all, every year thousands of men, entering into marriage unions, get divorced, after a rather short period. The reasons for such disintegration of families can serve as countless infidelities, inconsistency of a half of a fictitious ideal, material problems and so on. Factors provoking
For parting, depend on the degree of their internal organization, level of education, material independence, self-sufficiency of partners and their individual personal traits.

How to survive a divorce from your wife, if you still love

Most psychologists are convinced that women's andThe male half of the population perceive parting with their chosen ones unequally due to the presence of natural differences in the psyche between the sexes. Nevertheless, such a device of humanity does not allow to believe that men react to the gap less painfully and sharply.
External consistency of expression of feelingsRepresentatives of a strong part of mankind has its own reasons. After all, almost all males of their parents since their birth, parents, other adults, educators in pre-school institutions, teachers in educational institutions are inspired by the axiom that men should not cry and do not show their own emotions. This statement is firmly grounded in the subconscious of men and leaves a mark on all future life. It manifests itself in all life situations, including the relationship of the sexes.
So, after all, how easy is it to get over a divorce from your wife? How can they get out of the situation of the disintegration of relationships with the least consequences?
In the first turn, it is recommended not to rush toThe tying of a new love affair. It is necessary at first worthy of surviving the divorce, so that the next attempt would be more successful. It is also necessary to concentrate one's own strengths and aspirations on goals that will not have a connection with a love relationship. Such goals can be career, hunting, sports exercises or cars. The main thing is that the hobby was really interesting for a man.
At the same time it is recommended to spend timeAnd their own forces to analyze the current situation. One should think about what could have forced the former spouse to take such a serious step. After all, many women with the help of their "going to my mother," the constant collection of suitcases and threats of divorce are simply trying to somehow influence the husband or change something in his behavior. Therefore, we need to try to remember all the claims of the spouse against the partner. After all, it is likely that by liquidating them you can return your beloved "prodigal" wife home and direct the further development of relationships in a completely different direction, in which there will be no place for endless resentments and scandals, but love and harmony will reign.
Whatever the state of mind, notIt is recommended to grab a bottle and sink your own grief in a glass. The relief that alcoholic drinks give is an illusion. Alcohol can only emotionally weaken the man. Also do not need to run for advice to friends. After all, male friends will not understand the torments of an abandoned husband. Most likely, they just say that all the ladies are the same, and therefore do not worry much because of the gap, but rather quickly forget the one that did not appreciate their friend. After all, there are many women in the world. However, if the heart still has love, then it will be very difficult to forget the spouse. Therefore, after analyzing the situation and getting a fairly clear understanding of the reasons for what happened, you should try to talk with your beloved. In a conversation with the chosen one, you do not need to give her meaningless promises that can not be fulfilled. It is necessary to try to find a compromise, and also to find out whether love has been preserved in her heart, what she feels for her ex-wife, the reason for her leaving. The answers of the beloved will be demonstrated by the presence or absence of chances for the return of past relationships. And most importantly, help a man to understand what she really did not have.
How to survive the betrayal of his wife and divorce? In the case when the spouse "drowned" not in an empty space, but to another subject, then it is senseless to renew the relationship with her. Moreover, you do not need to humble yourself and pray for her to return to the family. Such actions will not only provoke a worsening of the situation, but will also aggravate the psychological state of the man. After all, the strong half, for the most part, is selfish and proprietary. They are uncomfortable when the former lady of the heart finds a gentleman, and if the spouse leaves her husband for the sake of another, then to the unpleasant sensation is added a sense of loss and pain. In this situation, not only does the sense of male dignity suffer, but also pride, and also the trust and love is desecrated. Care partners to another, men are regarded not as a banal betrayal, but as a betrayal, which is very difficult to survive. But there is nothing impossible in the world! Therefore, you need to take yourself in hand and live on. It is also recommended, if suddenly there was a pressing question: "how to survive the betrayal of the wife and divorce," try to understand his wife and forgive her. Because the feeling of resentment and
Can only lead to a dead end. Only after the true forgiveness of a woman will there be an opportunity for a happy future life. So it is arranged that each individual is responsible for his own actions independently. Therefore, the wife will answer for her so-called "sins" or mistakes, but one should not aggravate her own state of mind with negative emotions and anger.

How to survive a divorce with your wife if you have a child

Naturally, a couple who has lived together is not aloneYear and having common children, going through a divorce is more difficult and parting much more dramatically. This is due to the destruction of illusions, the failure to implement previously constructed plans, as well as the formation of certain habits and lifestyle associated with living together, dependency on each other.
How can a man survive a divorce from his wife and not losePaternal affinity and authority with children? It so happened that in most situations, children after breaking family ties remain with their mothers, as a result of which a man must experience a double loss - parting with his wife and children. Now he can only communicate with the offspring at times. When a child is old enough, the separation of parents for him is easier and much less impact on the psyche. But if the cell of society in which a small child grows grows, then both parents should carefully consider their own line of behavior so as not to injure the fragile psyche of their own child. In any scenario, it is necessary to expend all the forces and skills so that relations with the crumb are not affected. It is recommended, if possible, not to involve the children in a situation related to the rupture or to the communication of the parents. Men should try to solve the issue of joint custody of their offspring together with their spouse in the most constructive way. Also need to explain to the kids that they do not lose their dad, that nothing will change in the relationship, just the pope will live separately. Naturally, for children of all ages, a divorce will not be painless. Therefore, the task of parents is to minimize the negative consequences of parting for children.
Many men apply forPsychologists: "help me survive the divorce with my wife" and find the right strategy of behavior with my own children. At any interaction with children, one should not fill them with gifts and over-indulge, trying to compensate for their absence and blunt their own guilt. The most optimal is to spend more time with them, drive them to various interesting and informative places, take them on trips. In other words, one should direct his zeal on the development and upbringing of crumbs. It is necessary to become for them a companion, defender and a significant adult at the same time. Children need not only exclusively with their mothers, but also with their fathers to experience unforgettable moments in life and joyful emotions. Only thanks to such behavior it will be possible to save a place in the life of the offspring, even if the former spouse lives with a new gentleman who is now raising another's child.
It is also necessary to remember that if children have already reached the turn of the decade, then they have the right to choose whom they should live with.

How to survive a divorce with your wife - advice of a psychologist

Men due to marriage rupture exceptBreak with his wife and limiting communication with the offspring, are beginning to acutely experience and domestic problems that were previously part of women's responsibilities, for example, washing, cooking, ironing, cleaning and much more. Often, women even choose what to wear to a particular case to her husband. With her departure to the strong half, a heap of problems is being dumped, which must be resolved independently. As a result, the husband receives inspiration - it turns out that his wife, quite a lot of caring about him. As such care is left behind, the man even more begins to feel discomfort and a sense of loneliness.
Often, if the strongest representatives of humanityDecide to move away from fictitious stereotypes and turn to a professional psychologist for help, it will help them realize that they were burdened by their marriage relationship. As a rule, after visiting a psychologist, men begin to comprehend that in the union they were burdened with obligations to the faithful, and oppressed the responsibility for relations in the family, and after the divorce it turns out that they are not even able to answer for themselves. Men suddenly find themselves in a situation where there is no one to consult, in problem situations there is no support for the spouse. Only having survived the divorce, the strong half begins to understand what kind of psychotherapeutic force the family possessed.
Psychologists, to which husbands address with the request: "Help me survive the divorce with my wife," they say that it is because of the psychotherapeutic effect of the family that eighty percent of the male population, after a short period, starts to regard the former companion as almost ideal in the process of comparison with the new partner.
How easier it is to survive a divorce from a wife - advice from psychologists.
First, psychologists argue that to exitFrom the emotional discomfort associated with the breaking of relations, you need to accept divorce as a fait accompli. A man needs to completely reconcile himself to parting, not even to challenge him internally. It is also recommended to avoid loneliness and alcohol abuse. Men who survive the gap need an interlocutor. Such an interlocutor should be a close person for a divorced man, in which he will not restrain emotions and will be able to speak frankly. After all, men who allow themselves an open manifestation of feelings, live on average longer than those who for some reason used to restrain themselves. You do not need to go to extremes, blaming the destruction of the social unit, either yourself or your spouse. After all, curses against the former spouse, and feelings of guilt are destructive for the psychological health of men. It is recommended to load yourself with work, find new hobbies or hobbies, so that free time for sadness and destructive emotions does not remain.

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