The psychology of love is a sphere of the unknown,A favorite subject of thousands of poets, novelists and even scientists. The actions of a man in love can not be completely explained by any scientific community. A lover is a mystery and a challenge to science. After all, love exists autonomously, lives by itself, does not obey the laws of logic and reason. It can have a devastating effect on people, incinerating everything inside, and constructive, "lifting up to heaven." Most consider lovers to be slightly crazy, and from here, and love itself sees as some kind of mental illness. However, according to a number of scientists, love is a means of socialization of the individual, a mechanism for its involvement in the system of social interrelations.
Psychology of love and relationships
Mutual love before the deathbed and happyAll people on earth want to have a family life, but only some "lucky ones" manage to realize this dream in practice. Trustful and truly prosperous relationships will be formed only when both partners make efforts in comprehending the differences in the psychology of love between men and women.
Psychology of love and relationships of men and womenThe fair sex is quite different. It happened historically, but earlier this difference was not perceived so sharply, as all relations of the spouses were built, basically, on the life-style that developed as the society developed. There were generally accepted foundations that for several millennia had been telling how the spouses should behave, and they also prescribed certain duties for them. Modern views on family life, love relationships, extramarital affairs have changed somewhat.
For example, earlier the role of the wife was limited toFamily maintenance and care for all participants in family relations. Today, women take leaps and bounds to themselves with the right to individuality, to the opportunity to live in the way they like, and not at the bidding. Sharp emancipation of women before the weaker sex led to a loss of mutual understanding between the male and female part of the population. As a result, naturally the psychology of women in love, their behavior, mood and psychology of men in love have undergone quite significant changes.
In addition, that the beautiful feminine was originallyTheir nature is different from the representatives of the strong half, today they are more than ever exposed to the not always favorable impact of the society. All this together makes them even more incomprehensible to the opposite sex. At the man all is directed on a concrete minute, their organism is adapted to a fast single-moment splash of energy. Women act gradually and more plastically.
Psychology of women in love, in the first turn,Is conditioned by the desire to continue the race. The feeling of love makes the daughters of Eva truly feminine, it reveals their beauty and fascination, makes them gentle and complaisant. Women are much weaker in the physical terms of men, at least, that's what nature originally intended, but the newfangled craze for women in gyms makes this statement controversial for a certain number of ladies. In any case, the young lady is much more enduring than the strong half. They also have a more developed sense of responsibility, because they need to take care of the offspring.
Beautiful feminines are much more emotionalMale population. Their emotional manifestations of love psychology considers a physiological feature. In addition, emotions are an important component of the maternal instinct. After all, if a new mother does not have a close emotional connection with the baby, then often she refuses it.
Basically, the whole psychology of female love is connectedWith the desire to become a mother. Scientists are convinced that the concern of beautiful young ladies with appearance is due to the desire to attract males, caused by the instinct of procreation. Genetically and physiologically, the factor is not the tendency of women to
. Another major difference between ladies and gentlemenWe can consider the susceptibility of the female mood to the influence of the hormonal background. It is hormones can be caused, at first glance, slightly inadequate behavior of the chosen one.
Psychology of love and relationships, how to understand that you are loved
To establish mutual understanding in a pair andTrust relations between partners, it is necessary to remember always that there are two absolutely opposite views on reality, which generates differences in the psychology of a man and woman in love. Therefore, for successful, happy and long-lasting relationships, it is necessary to study the differences that are inherent in the psychology of love and love, sexual attraction and friendship, and skillfully combine all four components in the family life.
Love in terms of psychology impliesUnder a free relationship, based on mutual happiness and mutual trust. It has three aspects in itself: moral (obligations), emotional (intimacy) and physical (passion) aspects.
The moral component of love impliesReadiness to make joint solutions to problems. This aspect is based on respect for the positions and feelings of the partner, moral principles, intellectual abilities and dignity. Respect is the guarantor of trust and loyalty in a relationship.
The emotional side of love isIntimacy, unity, friendship. Love has an indissoluble connection with friendship, the basis of which are common views, goals, aspirations. In loving partners, friendship reaches its peak due to inner affinity and unity of souls, when the personal becomes a general and vice versa. It's a joy for a partner, empathy for him, enjoying his touch, which replace words, translate true feelings, hidden from others. Ordinary friendship does not imply such closeness. Such intimacy arises only when, in addition to the common interests in friendship, there is an attraction.
The physical aspect of love is based on passion,Characteristic for this behavior and excitement. The sexual attraction of such power, when the partner is the only source of physical satisfaction. The object of love is the most desired, and other partners are not attracted already.
All these aspects of the psychology of love inEqually important for building and developing relationships. In different pairs, there may exist their different combinations, characteristic for each kind of love. But the so-called "true love" is based on these three aspects, taken in equal proportions.
Psychology of love and love Has its own distinctive features. For partners who are in a state of love, the intimate connotation of the relationship is important, for the love of intimacy is not a priority. People in love are drawn to each other to avoid loneliness, partners who really love each other are self-sufficient, their inner world is characterized by independence from their partner. Love is characterized by the appearance of an enthusiastic state only in the presence of the object, in love happiness is continuous. Love is the desire to possess, and love is the desire to give. The first can be compared with the behavior of the baby, which is governed by a single desire "I want", the second - with the behavior of an adult, wise old experience. The first - empties, the second - fills. Love requires the presence of external attributes and affirmations, love is the desire of the couple to move in one direction.
Therefore, if you care about the topic: "The psychology of love and relationships, how to understand that you are loved," then in the first turn you need to learn to listen to your own heart, to notice signs of a verbal and non-verbal nature, and also to understand what desire dominates: to take or give.
Psychology of men in love
The sons of Adam are seen by women as full beingsSecrets and mysteries, however, a similar opinion and representatives of the strong half of the beautiful feminine. The woman's brain constantly tormented by thoughts: "What does he think about," "how to understand his actions," "what's going on in his head at all." Often, masculine behavior simply confuses Eve's daughters. How to find common ground, when often men and women do not want to find them? And if they want, I just do not know how.
In love it is called to help. In the first turn, you need to understand one simple fact: all people are striving for happiness, but the idea of this state is different for everyone. One is tasty enough to feel satisfied with one's own being, the other will go through life to the end, never knowing happiness. Someone can see the beautiful in the usual things and get pleasure from it, the other after achieving the next goal on the path to happiness, will feel devastated and unhappy, planning ahead for himself the next bar. At the same time, most people have similar needs - in safety, continuation of the family, respect, love. These are inalienable human aspirations, generated by instincts. The majority of men tirelessly repeat that when choosing a lady heart they are guided by the following criteria: a rich inner world and the ability to cook deliciously.
Psychology of a man in love Such that the representatives of the stronger sex, stronglyCunning, calling these criteria prevailing when choosing a second half. In the first turn, the sons of Adam in a romantic relationship are based on the young lady's compliance with his standards of beauty. A man at a subconscious level makes his choice in favor of a certain girl, based, mainly, on her appearance. Only much later, in the process of communicative interaction, a man begins to assess the inner world of the woman and her economy. Therefore, it is not necessary to paint the guy at the first rendezvous all his culinary achievements.
Psychology of men in love is due to the ancientInstincts. Consequently, self-confidence inspires confidence in a man. From here one can deduce the main components of the behavior of the strong half and their psychology of love:
- an uncompromising desire to conquer the girl she liked;
- a tendency to always dominate in relationships;
- the desire to feel your own superiority;
- the desire to please other ladies, and to attract their views; - the need for love and attention.
The psychology of men in love is initially basedOn the banal instinct to conquer and conquer. Many young ladies noticed that loving guys are capable of much for the sake of winning the heart of their beloved. Therefore, if the gentleman "sings" about love and constantly postpones the meeting, hiding behind the lack of time, does not respond to the requests of the girl, rarely calls, it shows that all his words are empty.
Instinct pushes the stronger sex onReckless, and sometimes even slightly inadequate actions, for the admiring gaze of your favorite eyes. In this case, girls should not think that such reckless behavior will last forever. The process of conquest of the beloved goes on usually not for long. As soon as the man makes sure that in the heart of the chosen one he firmly reigns, he will less and less start to give sudden gifts and make surprises. Rare representatives of the stronger sex are able to care for their chosen one throughout life. So, the beauty is conquered, the proud conqueror of women's hearts goes to rest, and the dominant male comes to the fore.
In love is such that for representatives of a strongSex is very important to dominate in relationships, to be the main in the family. Often, women hear a statement from the lips of their loved ones that they are always right, that all decisions remain with them, and the only argument in favor of such phrases is their belonging to the masculine gender. This desire to dominate is not due to instinct, rather it depends on upbringing, as well as on the model of relationships adopted in the boy's family. Adequate desire for men to dominate, do not need to be perceived as a defect, to fight against it and eradicate. After all, women - it's still a weak sex, which nature is intended to be the keeper of the hearth, but not his protector. Worse, when the wife has to pull on their own fragile shoulders and husband "getter" and children.
The psychology of men in love is also manifested inDesire to be the center of attention of the chosen one. Guys are pretty good for praise. Therefore, his beloved should be praised, emphasize his uniqueness, say how kind he is, clever and just wonderful. In this case, praise should not be blatant flattery. The lack of praises pushes the spouse to search on the side of the one who will be able to appreciate his dignity.
Men in marriage have a few other manifestations of love- psychology says so. After all, for the representatives of the strong half, the very word marriage is associated with loss of freedom, and in fact they are very afraid of any restrictions. In addition, it does not matter how much the spouse earns, what is his social status, he seeks to command and be the chief. Sometimes men have a family is the only place where they can assert themselves and work out a team voice. Also, "males" dream of an economic wife. And then it does not matter which of the spouses have more free time, the wife's lot is the kitchen. However, not all men behave in this way. Women need to remember that even if they were caught by the most agreeable chevalier, one should not go too far, defending the right to make decisions. If a man feels that his freedom is too limited and constantly pressured, then he will soon run away to freedom. A wise and loving spouse, who values family relations, should try to establish a way of life so that a man feels himself to be the head of the family in any scenario. After all, for the male part of the population, the actual power is not so important as the presence of a nominal one.
The psychology of men in love is inextricably linked withSexual desire and intimate relationships. Below is described the ideal intimate life with his wife through the eyes of a man. First of all, a strong sex must feel at the height of a bed-life. Therefore, in this sphere of joint existence, women should not be saved by enthusiastic exclamations and praise. In this area of relations, the spouse also seeks to dominate and it is necessary for him to allow it. At the same time, it will not be superfluous to occasionally show initiative and dominate in bed.
Psychology in the bed of representatives of a strongHalf is entirely due to their instincts. That is why men in intimate relationships always want to feel strong, skillful, attractive. If the spouse feels like this, being close to the faithful, then he will definitely not be looking for someone on the side.
In addition to professional, intimate sphere for menIt is also important to be implemented in your hobbies, for example, fishing or designing aircraft models. Therefore, to occupy the position of a tyrant, forbidding her husband from doing what pleases him, is not the best strategy. Any prohibitions strong sex perceives as a restriction of freedom, which will lead to the desire to break free. Men are freedom-loving beings, with whom one must be able to negotiate, and not act by prohibitions. Any restrictions in the pair, no matter which side they are on, always only harm the relationship.
Not only do women want to feel marriedLike men behind a stone fortress, men also need to know that they are safe, that they will not be betrayed, loved and expect to accept them any that will support their filling and help, if necessary. In addition, a man not only needs to feel safe, but also surrounded by the protection of all people dear to his heart. This is also a manifestation of an innate instinct, which can be briefly formulated with the following guidelines: my territory, my property, my wife, etc. Responsibility for the family, own property, the sense of ownership - all this is also very significant for any representative of the male part of the population. Therefore, women are encouraged to show their loved ones how important it is for them to feel the protection and support of their spouse. In addition, it is often necessary to tell husbands that they are strong and courageous.
Women should try not to let go ofAny attention, even the most insignificant success of his man. Only admiration in the eyes of the beloved and enthusiastic words will push the man to further accomplishments. Only with that woman will a man live his entire life, with which he will feel his own uniqueness and significance.
What, in fact, is a psychology of love and relationships, how to understand that you are loved?
In fact, knowledge of the foundations of male behavior and the main aspects
Is the main helper of the weaker sex in terms ofConquest of the beloved's heart. With age comes wisdom, and the path to knowledge is always open, there would be a desire. Only understanding the specifics of the behavior of a man in love will allow us to build healthy, lasting and happy family relationships. And if the beloved began to make less and less surprises, do not panic, believing that the chosen one fell out of love. After all, he simply could decide that he had already conquered his beloved, therefore, he now needs to take care of material well-being, and gifts will wait.
First Love Psychology
It is rare to find a subject who, in his youthOr in later youth would not have experienced the first love, the feeling when the legs swayed at the sight of the sighing object, threw them into fever, took breath, sweated hands and dried up in the mouth. When I always wanted to be near my beloved, to see him, to hear. In the absence of reciprocity, often a bad mood, loss of sleep and appetite, sneaky looks, quiet sighs, and, conversely, with mutual love - euphoria, riot of colors, happy mood, increased ability to work, energy just beats the key, the desire to hug all passers-by and Give them at least a little heat.
It is believed that the first feeling is the purest,Unclouded by self-interest, lust, desire to possess. The first love is an exalted feeling, to which the attitude is always only the most serious. After all, it is worth it to be born in the soul, as everything else immediately goes to the background - education, sports training, and hobbies are abandoned. Everything goes away, there is only one object of sighing. But the first love can not last forever. She, like everything else in life passes, but the wounds can leave pretty deep.
Despite the anguish, which sometimesLeaves the first love behind him, much brings pleasure in remembering her, telling about his experiences. Some people who have experienced this wonderful feeling in a very young age are convinced that it was love at first sight, but psychology says the opposite.
The first love is the psychology of relations. It is impossible at first sight to fall in love with a strangerMan, one can only experience the attraction of bodies, which can grow into something deeper, but this requires time. Instantly, the feeling of love does not arise. For the emergence of true love, the experience of relationships, the unity of souls, aspiration in one direction, patience and understanding, common views, attitudes, interests and principles, the desire to share all the joys and sorrows that have arisen. At first glance, all of the above can not appear.
Love at first sight, psychology denies, because love - it's not just a feeling, not an impression of a moment, it's the work of both partners, multiplied by the time.
Psychology perceives the first experience of loveRelations as an important personal test. She argues that the final stage in the formation of personality depends on how a person will experience a state of love.
Everyone is a social being. He lives in a society that dictates certain living conditions, behavior patterns, etc. Living the next role, every person knows exactly how to behave. For example, a child understands how he needs to behave, adults know what to do for family well-being. But when you have a feeling of first love, the person himself has to make decisions, think about what to do. In this role, the individual is both a student and an examiner. There are no prescribed rules because they can not be prescribed. Because love is irrational. In a situation of first love, a person is no longer a successful student or a caring father. Here he has to open in relation to the chosen one. To behave before your beloved uncovered, such as it really is.
Experiencing this high feeling, no one is guessing aboutWhat kind of beloved car, what apartment, the status of parents, material security. This feeling is permeated with romance, light and purity, but one can not treat it superficially, since the first love can, both donate freely, and break a person.
However, more interesting is the fact thatThe real first feeling of love is a rarity. You can meet a lot of individuals who did not experience this feeling, but there are also those who after many years can not forget the object of first love, which has a rather detrimental effect on the person himself.
Psychologists are convinced that the first feeling of love must be completed. It should be left only with pleasant easy memories that evoke either joy or sadness, but not melancholy or
. And even more so do not have to return toRelationships. Return to the past dooms a person to even greater anguish. The so-called "stuck" on the object of the first love contributes to an unsuccessful marriage. After all, dissatisfaction with today's life leads to an idealization of past relationships.
The next factor that causes the desire to return the object of first love, is
A person prone to splitting feelings. For example, a married woman like likes her own husband, but at the same time she scrolls through her head other possible options. And if the opportunity is granted, then the lady can not resist.
Narcissistic inclinations are the third factor that causes a return to former relationships.
, Self-admiration, admiration of one's own person does not allow to forget the time when there was so much excitement, admiration, so many tender and pleasant words were uttered to loved ones.
But the most significant factor is considered to bePredisposition of people to exist outside of time. For them there is only one category "always". Such people perceive everything that happened before, people, former relationships, as a component of their own life now, despite the fact that many years have passed, the situation has changed and nothing can be restored. Narcissistic personalities perceive first love not as a past feeling, but as something permanent.
But the situation is not more dangerous when people"Stalled" on the first feeling, and then, when people did not experience this feeling at a young age, when the first love comes at the age of forty. Such a situation is catastrophic, even in spite of the sublimity and creativity of this feeling, on the positive emotions that it carries in itself. A catastrophic situation is that at this age each person has a certain life structure, some already have families, children, work and everything that is necessary for a further happy life. And suddenly, suddenly, a feeling comes that overturns everything in life, changes the habitual way, and even destroys families. After all, life without a sighing object is meaningless. This is the main danger of a belated feeling of first love.
It is required to understand that the first love -Psychology claims sooner or later overtake everyone. It can be mutual or unrequited, but it will be remembered for life. Sensations generated by it, help a person to rediscover themselves. The first love is needed in order to teach people to love.